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Tuesday, March 17, 2009
A very boring post for u.
Actually these few days i've been quite worried. or maybe i have been worried eversince the beginning of the year. and the situation is getting worse.Firstly I havent got myself an internship. No banks want me :( Not many firms are hiring finance interns, even if some are, the job is basically that of an accounts clerk.What should I do?Actually I dont know why I'm a finance major.My knowledge of the finance industry is so limited, I often am lost between the different derivatives like the different kinds of funds, the different kinds of swaps etc etc etc. Though I may know the theory, but when it comes to application, i know nothing better than a monkey does.It sickens me that I'm a finance major but I dont have the knowledge and interests as my coursemates have.While hoping I can enter a bank or something more related to finance, I'm also at the same time very worried that I'll be seen as worse than a moron amongst these professionals.I'm so bad in numbers and maths, talk about analyzing trends and stuff I'm always the slow one.Sigh, I should really read more and a lot a lot more to catch up.But I lack the motivation and interest to do so.Sometimes I really wonder why I major in Finance.Maybe because I could clear most of my finance modules during my exchange in Manchester? I really dont know.Sometimes I find myself more interested in marketing instead.Double major? Too late for that. I'm just taking a few marketing modules that seem interesting to me.But the thing about marketing is, the line between this and sales is very thin in the actual world.So there is a high chance that if I do marketing, I will end up doing sales instead.Whats bad about sales? I dont know, maybe it just doesnt sound good to me.Thats why while looking out for internships in areas of finance, I'm also applying for marketing related ones.Either one will do. Either one will give me a clearer direction of where I want to head I guess?
Haih, actually all I want is a simple and normal life.But I dont want too routine or normal a life.I told you I'm lost.Increasingly worried by the day. Sigh sigh sigh sighing off.